The Wackiest Ship in the Army: Couldn’t Find Its Viewers

We are half-way through our blog theme for July, which is Military Upended as we look at military sitcoms that all debuted in the mid-sixties.

Like our show from last week, Mister Roberts, this one debuted in 1965 and ran for one season. This hour-long NBC series was produced by Harry Ackerman and Herbert Hirschman. It was loosely based on a film from 1960. Our show last week, Mister Roberts, was also based on a movie that starred Jack Lemmon. Lemmon was in this movie as well with Ricky Nelson.

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The show is set in World War II and focuses on the crew of the USS Kiwi in the Pacific theater. This old schooner, flying a Swiss flag, carries out covert missions behind Japanese lines. The commander is Major Simon Butcher (Jack Warden) and Lieutenant Richard Riddle (Gary Collins). Butcher controls land operations while Riddle commands at sea. The Kiwi was previously owned by New Zealand.

Also in the cast were Chief Petty Officer Willie Miler (Mike Kellin), Radioman Patrick Hollis (Mark Slade), Machinist Seymour Trivers (Fred Smoot), Gunner’s Mate Sherman Nagurski (Rudy Solari), and Pharmacist Charles Tyler, the cook, (Don Penny).

The Kiwi was based on the USS Echo, a 40-year-old schooner given to the US Navy by New Zealand to use during the War. The ship was returned in 1944. Its poor condition made it useful for spying. The wooden hull did not show up on radar, its sailing power didn’t register on sonar, and the shallow draft allowed it to travel in shallow waters.

The show was scheduled for Sunday nights. The tough part of the schedule was that it was up against Candid Camera and What’s My Line, very popular programs at the time. However, it was helped by following Bonanza, the number one show that year.

The composer of the theme song was the celebrated Nelson Riddle. With more than 100 credits he worked on films including High Society and Guys and Dolls; did variety shows for Dinah Shore, Frank Sinatra, Nat King Cole, Julie Andrews, and Rosemary Clooney; and lots of television series including The Untouchables, Route 66, Emergency, and Newhart.

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Eddie Foy III talked about casting this show during his Television Academy interview. He said it was one of the best casts of any show he worked on. He said their producer brought the dramatic style the show needed to uphold the comedy. He said Danny Arnold was the talent behind this series and that Danny used to always say that writers aren’t funny and actors aren’t funny, but writers and actors who are successful think funny. Foy worked with him on That Girl and then continued as his casting director for years. Arnold gave everyone on the show freedom to do what they did best, so Foy did not have to run every casting decision by him.

The show was canceled after one season due to low ratings. I’m not sure if it was the quality of the show or if it was a victim of too many shows like this one. During the year this one debuted, we also had McHale’s Navy, F-Troop, Hogan’s Heroes, Gomer Pyle USMC, as well as tons of westerns, and extremely popular sitcoms like I Dream of Jeannie, Green Acres, Bewitched, That Girl, The Dick Van Dyke Show, The Andy Griffith Show, Get Smart, Batman, Petticoat Junction, and My Three Sons.

When you take into account that you had to watch shows live and there were only three choices at a time, it’s easy to understand how some good shows that might be recorded now received low ratings then. That said, this show never seemed to be sure what it was either. It was listed as a sitcom, but it was an hour-long show which was unusual. It wasn’t filmed before an audience, nor did it include a laugh track. And, it sometimes had episodes where people died, not so funny. If you wanted to see a funny military show, there were a lot of other options. There were also lots of good sitcoms and good dramas that all knew what their genre was. If you want to give it a try, it’s available on Philo.

Mister Roberts: The Third Time Was Not the Charm

As we continue with our theme of Military Upended where we are taking a lot at several military sitcoms, today we delve into Mister Roberts.

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This series was based on a novel of the same name from 1946. The novel became a play in 1948 and a movie was released in 1955. A decade later, it hit the television air waves.

The show was set in World War II and follows the crew of the USS Reluctant AK-601 cargo ship, which the men called “The Bucket.” Like F-Troop that we discussed last week, it was a Warner Brothers show, produced by William T. Orr.

Lieutenant Roberts (Roger Smith) wasn’t happy on a cargo ship and wanted to be directly involved in the war. Ensign Pulver (Steve Harmon) tried to make things fun on the ship. Like McHale’s Navy, the entire crew was happy to stymie Captain Morton (Richard X. Slattery) in all of his efforts. Roberts wrote letters asking for reassignment to active duty, but they were all intercepted by Captain Morton and never sent.

Rounding out the cast was Doc (George Ives), Seamen Reber (Ray Reese), D’Angelo (Richard Sinatra), and Mannion (Ronald Starr).

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The theme song was composed by Frank Perkins. Perkins had more than 70 music credits; he composed all the music for Hawaiian Eye.

The show debuted on NBC on Friday nights. Its competition was The Smothers Brothers Show and The Farmer’s Daughter. The Smothers Brothers Show followed three very popular shows. The Wild Wild West (a top 40) began the night, with Hogan’s Heroes and Gomer Pyle USMC, both top ten shows, following. I’m guessing many viewers stayed with CBS all evening, and if they did not, perhaps after watching two military sitcoms, they were ready to watch something different the rest of the night.

It sounds like this show could not draw viewers and could never it the same quality that the movie provided, so it was cancelled after the first season. Jack Lemmon won the Oscar for his role in the big-screen version. In 1984 a made-for-television movie was aired based on the play. I guess they just wanted to make it successful somehow. Currently, it’s not available for streaming. If you do have fond memories of this one, let me know.

F-Troop: Braving Fort Courage

As we start our July blogs, the theme is Military Upended. We’re taking a look at military sitcoms and up first is F Troop. This was a western sitcom set in the 1860s. It debuted on CBS in September of 1965 and ran for two seasons.

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If you and your siblings argue about whether this show was in color or black and white, you’re both right. The first season was in black and white, and the second season was produced in color.

The characters lived at Fort Courage, an army outpost. Captain Wilton Parmenter (Ken Berry) runs, or tries to run, the fort. One of the running gags is that Parmenter comes from a long line of military heroes that stopped with him. However, he served during the Civil War. After being told to pick up the general’s laundry near Appomattox, he begins sneezing. Union soldiers think it’s a command to charge which turns the tide of the battle. Then while Parmenter’s father is pinning the Medal of Honor on him for this feat, he pricks his chest, drawing blood for which they gave him a Purple Heart.

Parmenter is sent to Fort Courage where all the captains have failed. Two of the three commanders before him deserted, and one had a nervous breakdown there.

Parmenter is “aided” by Sergeant O’Rourke (Forrest Tucker) and Corporal Agarn (Larry Storch). However, these two are there just to make a quick buck however they can; they often work with Chief Wild Eagle (Frank de Kova) to find the next shady business deal. For example, the government thinks 30 men are at the fort; in reality, it’s 17 and the pay for the other 13 is put into a fund by the two men to fund their plans. However, the two men, while willing to take advantage of his gullibility, do like Parmenter and protect him. Parmenter is kind and well meaning.

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What Wil really needs protection from is marriage. The local store owner-postmistress Jane (Melody Patterson) has set her cap for him. She’s a beautiful tomboy who knows what she wants and usually gets it. She is also a telegrapher and is the best sharpshooter in the territory. She often rescues Wil with her good aim.

Patterson auditioned for this role at age 15, lying about her age. The show didn’t find about that till half-way through the first season. When the series started, she was 16 and Berry was 32. During the second season, when she turned 17, the producers allowed a more serious relationship between the two.

Rounding out the cast was Private Dobbs (James Hampton), a bugler who only knows two songs; Trooper Vanderbilt (Joe Brooks), the lookout who is almost blind; and Trooper Duffy (Bob Steele) the lone survivor of the Alamo who is too old to help much.

We also get to know several members of the Hekawis tribe headed by Chief Wild Eagle. They are 50/50 partners with O’Rourke and Agarn. They make souvenirs for sale and produce whiskey. They claim to be a peaceful nation because most of them are cowards like the men at the fort. The Chief has many wise sayings and often gives advice although when asked to explain some of them, he says he has no idea. His second in charge is Crazy Cat (Don Diamond).

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Not surprisingly for the time, none of the tribal members are played by Native Americans. There is a lot of politically incorrect dialogue on the show. The Hekawe (pronounced “heck-ow-ee”) tell the story of how they got their name: Two indigenous people fell off a cliff and one asked “Where the heck are we?” which they chose for their name.

A lot of stereotypes exist not only about Native Americans but military heroes and the west in general. History is presented tongue in cheek with characters showing up who never would have been there and sly references to things that were happening in the sixties.

A number of guest stars somehow end up at Fort Courage. These include Jamie Farr, Bernard Fox, Zsa Zsa Gabor, Harvey Korman, Paul Lynde, Lee Meriwether, Julie Newmar, Vincent Price, and Don Rickles.

The popular theme music was composed by William Lava with lyrics by Irving Taylor. Lava had more than 500 television credits for composing. While he worked in animation a lot, he composed for Dr. Kildare, The Twilight Zone, Wagon Train, and 77 Sunset Strip. His collaborators included Henry Mancini and Sammy Kahn.

The series featured a lot of great writers including Stan Dreben who wrote for Green Acres, Seaman Jacobs and Howard Merrill from The Dick Van Dyke Show, and James B. Allardice who wrote for a lot of shows including My Three Sons and Hogan’s Heroes.

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Storch was nominated for an Emmy Award for his role. His competition included Brian Keith for Family Affair, Bob Crane from Hogan’s Heroes, and Don Adams from Get Smart who won. I admit I was surprised to see his nomination given the classic television sitcoms that were on the air at the time.

ABC placed the show on Tuesday nights for season one which helped its ratings because there wasn’t a lot of competition. It was up against Red Skelton which was waning in its popularity, and it followed McHale’s Navy, and the same type of audience who enjoyed that show probably liked F-Troop as well.

After the second season, the show was ranked 40th out of 113 shows. According to Forrest Tucker, Warners Brothers was sold to Seven Arts, and they made the decision to cancel the show because they felt it used too much of the Warner Ranch for its setting and they weren’t thrilled about the added costs of producing this one in color.

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Fun fact, a replica of the fort was built in Houck, Arizona on Route 66. The Fort displayed F-Troop props, and they sold F-Troop merchandise. Among the amenities were a coffee shop, gas station, grocery store, pancake house, trading post, motel units, trailer park, and campground.

This show is a tougher one to evaluate now. Like so many shows from this era, Native Americans were not portrayed respectfully. However, truth be told, Natives were often portrayed as smarter than white men on this show. Like The Simpsons, everyone on this show was made fun of. It could be compared to The Phil Silvers Show or Hogan’s Heroes. It does have the military money-making schemes that Sergeant Bilko attempted but that was seen as a small part of a respectable military.

For me there was too much emphasis on slapstick humor apart from some of the uncomfortable dialogue. If you want to check it out and see what you think, which is what I always recommend, the series is available on DVD. It’s also on Prime and Roku.